The risky strategy of trusting your memory

Have you ever ended up in an argument about what happened at a past event? Yeah, I know, it happens. I try to remind myself about how my memory can't be trusted. Neither can yours. 

I've been thinking about memories while spending a few days in the town where I grew up. As I went running around the old neighbourhood, things came to mind. But I know enough neuroscience to understand how memory works. When I bring this to mind, I try to pause and look at my memories with a bit of humility. (Needless to say, I sometimes forget...) 

Being humble around memories is a good idea, because the initial 'encoding' of an event in memory doesn't remain fixed. Every time we recall something, we grab an opportunity to somewhat modify, shape or alter it. We talk about the memory with someone, and what they remembered may also get incorporated into ours. What we remembered in the first place was also coloured by what we paid attention to and how we felt at the time - our experience will have differed from that of others. 

All of this matters when it comes to how we relate to others when we discuss past events. A memory can seem so real, so specific and so very certain. In reality, though, it is supple and can be moulded by the brain and by any new input. This fact is worth recalling when we argue with someone about what happened - if we can remember it, that is. 

This lake is close to my childhood home. I remember things about swimming here, but the memories are rather comfortingly vague!